Department of Lost Letters

Sweet Merlin's beard!

Fri, 18 Jan 2013 14:28:56 -0600

One hundred and sixty-five messages requesting letters. I suppose most of you have not read the terms and conditions of the Department, as well as my post explaining the fact that I had to at least temporarily cease letter-making because of busy times.

If you are interested in a PDF-form letter (just as beautiful and unique as a mailed version), please e-mail ministryofmagic.dll(at)gmail.com.

Thank you for your time.

The Department of Lost Letters

A Letter to Universal Orlando Studios - In Re the Wizarding World of Harry Potter

Thu, 17 Jan 2013 17:15:46 -0600

To Whom It May Concern:

My name is Luca Keefer. I’m a nineteen-year-old, online college student, studying for a BFA in Creative Writing for Entertainment. Harry Potter is my life. The books were my adolescence and the final film - which debuted the summer after my senior year of high school - capped off my childhood. I have read every book, watched every movie, and spent more money than is probably wise on Harry Potter-themed everything.

Over spring break, I went for the first time to the Wizarding World in Orlando. It was like coming home for the first time. I suffer at times debilitating social anxiety and yet never once felt overwhelmed within the park. I was part of the scenery by my second day, dressed in my robes and my house tie. I gave directions to lost guests, posed for a few pictures on request, and even filled people in on when the live shows would be. Like I said, I was at home.

Unfortunately spring break doesn’t constitute real life and I had to leave the one place that made me feel natural. Though I had souvenirs to keep me distracted, nothing was quite the same. A picture is great but being there is incredible.

On December 18th, I returned home again, bringing my twelve-year-old cousin with me. Just as with my first visit, I wore appropriate wizarding attire for a Slytherin like myself. I indoctrinated him into the magic. I bestowed upon him the lore and legend that spills from every crack and crevice of the Wizarding World. I pointed out the subtle things and took him to Ollivander’s where he was chosen by his wand. If anything, it completely topped my first visit to the park.

The next day, I decided to let my little cousin run around the rest of the parks with my mum and grandmother. Meanwhile, I stood for three hours between Gladrags and Scrivenshaft’s. I answered questions about rides, gave directions, and melted into the scenery. I also posed for several dozen photographs ranging from lone shots where the photographer was catching me at a distance to group photos where I was surrounded by entire families. I even had two young siblings come up to me for an autograph. I also had a lovely conversation with one of your Hogwarts Express conductors about what I was doing outside the castle.

There is no question for me about being in character. From the moment I slipped on my tie until the moment I crashed into my hotel room bed, I was one hundred percent in the game. My wand was kept at the ready inside my robe, presented when people inside (and outside) the park asked if I had one. I kept to my character when probed by teenage girls whether I was being paid to act in character or not. It was also the most fun I have had in ages.

So I’m putting this out there.

I love your park. I think the atmosphere is absolutely incredible, the attention to detail is remarkable, and the rides are heart-stopping (in the best of ways). I love the staff inside the shops, restaurant, and working the rides. I love the enthusiasm of your performers. Now I just think there is room for a few more people, people like me.

Think about it.

Out of all of the places in Islands of Adventure, the Wizarding World certainly attracts the most immediate attention. Get to the park at opening on any given day and I bet almost all of the traffic will be heading directly for the gates of Hogsmeade.

So why don’t you add to the atmosphere and also help reduce the unavoidable traffic jams? Why not give the people more immersion and less distraction from the magic of it all? I saw more than one small child asking their parent for a robe after seeing mine. Just imagine what it would be like to have real staff playing the roles I filled.

I’m not asking for much. I mean, I’m going to keep returning to the Wizarding World no matter what. But would a minimum wage salary be that much of a trade-off for better traffic flow and increased revenue? I’m not a business major but I do know a thing or two about satisfying the masses. Let me bring life to Hogsmeade in a whole new way and I’m sure you’ll see drastic, positive change.

Sincerely,

Luca A. Keefer

That’s me. My name is Luca Arcturus Keefer. I’m the...

Thu, 17 Jan 2013 17:14:01 -0600

That’s me. My name is Luca Arcturus Keefer. I’m the man behind the mystery. I faithfully typed every letter that got sent, made the envelopes by hand, sealed them with wax.

Now I’ve returned. To ask for your help.

I’m sure you all realise how much Harry Potter means to me. I wrote over one hundred letters to places like Australia, Scotland, Brazil, Mexico, and more. I still itch to continue the magic of the letters.

But I have found a new way to spread magic.

That second picture is from my trip to the Wizarding World in Florida. That little kid is my twelve-year-old cousin on his first trip there.

I spent three hours standing alone in that spot and allowed several dozen strangers to ask me directions, pose for pictures, and generally pick my brain. I also had two lovely little kids come up for my autograph in their little autograph books

I was paid exactly zero dollars.

I’ve sent a letter to Universal Studios Orlando, however, informing them of the great service I could provide their park.

I know it like the back of my hand. The lore is already inside of my head. You don’t have to ask me to be in character.

All I need is the job to be there for me.

So I ask you all to consider reading my letter to them (which I will post in a moment) and, if you agree, perhaps send them a letter supporting me.

Thank you all for your time.

Keep spreading the magic.

Yours most sincerely,
Luca A. Keefer

Will they all get sent out eventually?

Tue, 07 Aug 2012 18:37:59 -0500

Eventually if all goes well. Do consider that all of our supplies, including our master list, is located across the country. If you have updated information, it may be wise to send us that. Also, do consider that we have opened up the instant method whereby we send you a beautiful, unique PDF of the same quality as our printed letters. We can also give you all information you need to print your letter just as we print ours.

Sincerely,
The DLL

Have each and every one of the letters that were requested been sent out yet?

Tue, 07 Aug 2012 13:56:00 -0500

No. Short answer: Chaos in real life. Long answer: Mental health problems and moving across the country. Apologies for all of the inconvenience and what not. This is, unfortunately, a side effect of working a job that, instead of paying you, costs you loads of money.

Sincerely,
The DLL

Mr. Petrick,

Fri, 06 Jul 2012 10:13:00 -0500

We will get out a letter to you sometime today or tomorrow. The professor’s schedule is currently a bit tight but, never fear, you will not be forgotten. Expect an e-mail from the Ministry of Magic, Department of Lost Letters’ official GMail account by this time tomorrow.

Sincerely,
Sebastian Phoenix
Intern, Ministry of Magic
Department of Lost Letters, Hogwarts Division

If any of you will be at VidCon this Friday and Saturday, try to find us. We’ll be wearing our...

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 05:35:17 -0500

If any of you will be at VidCon this Friday and Saturday, try to find us. We’ll be wearing our Slytherin prefect badge.

In addition to the last post,

Wed, 20 Jun 2012 09:14:27 -0500

There is a guaranteed next-day turnaround on all orders placed for PDF letters. Mailed letters are usually at least a full month before they are sent out, occasionally longer if circumstances are not right.

Sincerely,
The Staff

Important Announcement:

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 10:49:47 -0500

Dear witches, wizards, and Muggles,

We would like to extend a special offer outside of the usual postal option. If you have ordered a letter and not yet received it or if you came after we closed our doors to new orders, we will now reopen them for a certain circumstance. You will still receive a letter with the professor’s signature as well as the Hogwarts’ crest but you will receive it through a PDF sent to you via e-mail. It will look nearly identical to the letters received via mail but it will arrive much more hastily and will also lack a wax seal. If you are interested, please send us a message and (if you are a previous orderer who has yet to receive their letter) include your name so we can check our records for your information.

Thank you for your cooperation, patience, and patronage.

Yours sincerely,
Sebastian Phoenix
Intern, Ministry of Magic
Department of Lost Letters, Hogwarts Division

PS If anyone is swayed by this alone, you will also receive a personalised e-mail from me.

This is about Aqeela Azard's letter, ok u can email it to her, but how do i give you the email add?

Sat, 16 Jun 2012 07:35:44 -0500

Our email address is ministryofmagic.dll@gmail.com

To the Friends of Ms. Azard:

Thu, 14 Jun 2012 17:27:15 -0500

We just don’t think we will have the time to get your dear friend her letter. However, we would be willing to craft a personal letter in PDF format to e-mail to you or even directly to her through our Ministry address. We just really don’t want to mail a letter so far away for so much postage if it isn’t going to reach its intended target.

Sincerely,
The DLL

To the girlfriend of Mr. Zambrano,

Fri, 08 Jun 2012 18:34:02 -0500

Your boyfriend did not claim his mail and his letter was thus returned to us unopened. If you have another address for him, we can send it there or we can send it directly to you for sake of making sure it is delivered.

Ms. Perez,

Mon, 04 Jun 2012 11:43:34 -0500

For a friend, anything.

Sincerely,
The DLL

To the Friends of Ms. Azard:

Sun, 27 May 2012 06:47:17 -0500

We highly doubt we will be able to get her a letter by then as we are not at our headquarters until next Tuesday (the fifth) and we are unsure of how long the delivery of a letter to such a far away place will take. We will try our best but, as we said, we cannot control the postal service.

Announcement:

Thu, 24 May 2012 09:10:35 -0500

We bear good and bad news today. The positive news is that we will soon have less than twenty letters in total left to send out. However, due to lack of funding, these will be the last letters we send for the foreseeable future. We cannot continue working without donations, though we hate to toss in the towel. We hope you all can understand our circumstances.

Sincerely,
The DLL

Ms. Singh and Ms. Ortiz,

Wed, 23 May 2012 20:20:15 -0500

We have received both of your requests and will process them in due time. As always, mind our delay and consistent lack of funding.

Thank you for your continued cooperation and patience,
The DLL

We promise we will get you all your letters. However, due to lack of funding and the tedious nature of our jobs, our mailings will be much more infrequent than previously. We apologise for any inconvenience this may cause you.

Thu, 17 May 2012 10:07:18 -0500

Ms. Sych,

Tue, 15 May 2012 17:51:44 -0500

We have received your order and will add it to our processing list. Do be aware that we are experiencing some delays due to financing issues and constantly limited supplies.

Sincerely,
The DLL

lucasacross: While I have possession of this body, I might as...

Fri, 11 May 2012 16:42:57 -0500

lucasacross:

While I have possession of this body, I might as well customise it to my suiting. This is freshly inked and about five hours old. It’s on my inner right leg, just above the ankle (as you might notice).

Professor’s Cross proves his devotion by sitting for this tattoo.

Mr. Zambrano's letter was given to the post office today and should be mailed out tomorrow.

Fri, 04 May 2012 14:03:13 -0500